A Night To Remember

Last night I had the privilege of seeing Eddie Izzard perform live at Radio City Music Hall. I say privilege because there's something very special about RC. Not only is it a fabulous hall, but if all goes well, you get to see what is very likely one of the greatest moments in the life of a performing artist. So shows at RC are infused with a special energy that few other venues can offer. It's pure magic.

The show, "Stripped" was great. I'll buy the DVD whenever it comes out.

"Speaking Truth To Power"

Sometimes comedians are the only ones with the courage and/or the access to speak the truth to those in power.

Stephen Colbert at the White House Press Dinner is one such example.

Thanks, Ron

This weekend I caught Ron White's new special, You Can't Fix Stupid. Now you might not expect a nerdy, NYC, intellectual fag like me would enjoy a Texas good 'ole boy like him.... But Ron White kicks ass!



He's got such a marvelous combination of wit, satire, confidence and is a gifted story teller.

And this is now the third TV special of his I've seen him end with a joke on how stupid and pointless homophobia is. Not only is the bit damn funny, but I'm genuinely touched that a guy like him would spend his show biz capital in defense of a guy like me.

I can scream at red-state-ers until I'm all blue state in the face and they'll probably never hear a word I say. But when Ron White says it, maybe, just maybe they'll listen.

Thanks, Ron. You're a class act, man.

Secret Stash

I've just discovered Comedy Central's Secret Stash. Late Friday and Saturday nights they air completely uncensored shows. There's some TiVo worthy stuff here like the Pamela Anderson Roast, Lisa Lampanelli and the South Park movie.


Even if you're not into the Baywatch babe, check out the Pamela Roast tonite. It's one of funniest things I've ever seen on television. Andy Dick plays with Pamela's tits and Courtney Love is a total strung out skank. It's a train wreck.

A Comic's Comic

Leil David is a comic I've seen around town a few times who I've always enjoyed. His jokes about being a Star Trek nerd always hit home with me, being a big fat nerd myself.

Now I've discovered he's also created an online comic strip that is a combination of bits from his act, commentary about the process of comedy and inner monologue stuff. It's a riot and will definitely appeal to comics and nerds.

Check out Leil David's Comic Strip.

(P.S. I'm always amused by words that spell checkers don't recognize. A gold star on the forehead of whomever correctly guesses which common, simple word in this post that was rejected by Blogger.com spell check.)

My Promising Future in Voice Over

On Sunday night I went to Adam Sank's new show at Therapy Bar. (He blogged about it.) It was after the Emmy Awards and he had this whole intro bit with a little trophy and celebrity acceptance speech parody. I love how Adam is often willing to go way out on a limb to do customized intros for some of his gigs. It shows the audience that he is paying attention to the particulars of the evening and willing to go to special effort for them.

Adam had me read his intro into an off stage mic as part of the whole gag. After the show he came over to thank me for doing his intro. The audience member I was sitting next to said, "Oh, that was you? I thought it was a drag queen."

Perfect.

Opposites Attract

Under the title, "I Hate Gay Men," fellow gay comic and sexy little vixen, Adam Sank, mentioned in his blog the problem that gay comics have with gay audiences. Put simply, gay audiences are not impressed by gay comics. "Yeah, whatever fag boy. We've heard it all before."

I have experienced this myself. I have bombed in front of gay crowds as badly as anyone has ever bombed. So I don't pretend to be an expert on this. But I do have a few thoughts about this, about which I will now proceed to ramble.

Straight audiences see us as fun, cosmopolitan, catty, outrageous ... whatever. Especially tourists, "Oh goody! A gay comic! I loooooove Will & Grace!" We get extra credit from straight crowds just for being gay. 95% of the crowds I play are straight and I'm usually the token homo on the bill. So I have fun with that status and get extra laughs for it.

But the flip side is that our own people really make us work. They're inherently bored by us, because they are us and we are them. There's nothing intriguing about being gay for them.

The same is sometimes true in reverse for straight girl comics, who can have a tough time with mainstream crowds. If they're ugly, the guys hate them. And if they're pretty, the girls hate them. (It ain't PC, but it's true.) But gay male audiences love girl comics. Witness the force of nature that is Margaret Cho and her eight billon gay fans. Girl comics get extra credit from gay men for being themselves. "You go girl!"

I find that just realizing these dynamics can help.

Some of my gay material is constructed to play to the audience's reaction of, "Oh neato! He's gay!" And when I play straight rooms a lot, I get used having that there. When that feeling isn't there, that means of establishing a connection doesn't work. That doesn't mean the bits can't work. It just means there needs to be a shift in attitude and delivery.

I find that if I just switch inside my own head from "Look at me, I'm gay, Wheeeee!" to, "OK, we're all gay here, so let's relate," sometimes it's enough.

Gay comic Michael Brill is an absolute master at this. Every time I play a show with him at Don't Tell Mama's I learn from him. I watch him on stage with something approaching awe. He can connect to any audience, gay or straight, guys or gals, time and again.

If I'm having a tough time connecting to a particular crowd I'll play to the girls first. As a gay comic, I can use that gay guy/straight girl bond to bring the girls in. In fact, whether or not I'm having a tough time, I usually play to girls first, even if it's just for 30-60 seconds.

Guys out on dates with girls wanna get laid after the show. And most girls hate homophobic guys. So if the guy is a jerk, he's not gettin' any.

"Ooooo! Isn't he fabulous, honey?"

"Yeah, sure, baby. Whatever. Have I told you how great your tits look in that outfit?"

So girls bring their guys with them. This is still true when the guys are gay. Get the fag hags and you'll get their fags with them.

So, yeah, gay crowds are tricky for a gay comic.

But, "Ve hov vays ov making you laugh."

Tough Crowd

The crowd at Joe Franklin's Comedy Club last night was tough, tough, tough. They just weren't givin' it up, to anyone, for anything. The headliner was black albino, Victor Varnado, a guy whose unique style and stories I quite enjoy. They didn't even perk up for the headline act, something I've never seen before. Usually no matter how stingy a crowd is, they'll finally start getting into it once they've gotten their two drinks in them ... not these folks.

I think part of a the problem is that the light in the room is too bright. There's a good reason comedy clubs are usually dark. If people feel like they're being too-closely watched, they get self conscious. If they're self conscious, they won't laugh. In fact, like a geisha they'll actually intentionally stifle their own laughter because the don't want to be seen laughing. I saw some of them doing that last night.

I gently mentioned the lighting to the show producer afterwards and she agreed. In fact, she's way ahead of me. She said dimmers are being installed, which I think will help the atmosphere immensely. It's a small thing, but it's one of the many factors that determine whether a show works or not.

Despite the crowd's low energy, I enjoyed myself. Leighann Lord's attitude rings in my ears, "They're facing the stage and they're paying attention. I can work with that."

And so can I.

I dragged a few good laughs out of them and tried a few new things I've been wanting to do.

One of them is a simple little audience participation gag that worked far better than I'd ever hoped it could. In fact, them being only barely engaged made it work even better.

I've been thinking a lot lately about how material that actively engages the audience usually gets the strongest response of anything. That's why crowd work, works.

I was also thinking this week about two things: how I enjoyed having fun at the expense of last week's hecklers, and how one of my girl comic friends at the show was teasing me for the white silk pants I often wear to perform.

I combined these two things into the following little practical joke on the audience.

I did two short bits, including the opening bit about my new clothes, and then I said,

"I have a theory I'm hoping you folks will help me out with. I think comedy show audiences can be divided into two groups. So group one, by applause please, everyone who's already figured out that I'm your token homo comic for the night."

[A smattering of chuckles and two people clapped timidly.]

"And the second group, by applause please, blind retards."

[Big laughs, nods of recognition and most of the rest of the audience applauds.]

"You sir, you couldn't figure it out?! How much help did you need?! I'm wearing white pants and the gayest shirt ever! I got this shirt because the costume department for Will & Grace thought it was just too flamboyant!"

The bit worked really well, but for exactly the opposite reason I thought it would.

I expected almost everyone would respond to the first question, leaving only a couple people to pick on with the second question. Instead, only a couple people responded to the first question. So by refusing to participate, they put themselves into the second category without knowing what it would be. So part two worked as a kind of "Gotcha!"

I like this bit a lot and plan to make it part of my regular set whenever I'm the only gay comic in a show with a straight crowd. I think it will play especially well with the tourists.

Speaking of Leighan, she mentioned me in her blog recently. She commented on me, commenting on her. And now I'm commenting on that. Oh the circle of love just goes 'round and 'round.

Comedy Work Ethics

Leighann Lord, a comedian I've mentioned here before, who I just adore, on reading my blog recently commented to me that I had a good work ethic. In addition to this being a delightful compliment from someone I greatly respect, it got me thinking. What exactly are my work ethics as comic?

Since long before I thought about doing comedy myself, for years, I have enjoyed stand-up at the clubs here in New York City. Now that I'm a comic, these places have changed for me. They're no longer just places of entertainment for me, they are my workplace. Don't get me wrong. They're a workplace I cherish! But they're my workplace just the same.

So here are my rules for myself. As with all sets of ideals, they are lofty. I am certain I will not live up to them all the time. But I will strive to abide by these as best as I'm able.

MY COMEDY WORK ETHICS

1. I will maintain a professional image and demeanor at all times.
   
2. I will not step foot in a comedy club, whether I'm booked or not, without being dressed to perform.
3. I will dress to perform, as recommended by my second coach Jim Mendrinos, "a little better than you dress for a date." This dress code is part of a larger ethic.
   
4. The audience has come for "a show". Dressing well is part of showing my appreciation to the audience for coming to see me in person, instead of staying home and watching Comedy Central.
   
5. Regardless of the size of the audience or the status of the venue, I will give my all. I will perform to the best of my ability, with the best energy I have to give.
   
6. I will seek to bring the best and strongest aspects of my personality on stage.
   
7. I also feel an obligation to the club management to deliver. Yes, I will try new material. But I will also ensure I deliver the laughs. That means being aware of what's happening in the room before I go on, during the show. It means being aware of the composition and attitude of the audience. It means responding to how they are reacting to material. It means adapting as best as I'm able to the situation and using every means at my disposal to deliver the laughs.
8. I will be prepared. New material will have been written down, edited and rehearsed before it is performed the first time.
   
9. I will be prepared. I will have a written set list before I go on stage, every time. I will do my best to commit my set list to memory. I will not refer to my set list nor will I use notes on stage unless unusual circumstances make it absolutely necessary.
10. Benjamin Franklin said, "Let thy discontents be thy secrets." I will keep petty complaints to myself. I will be appreciative to management for the opportunity to perform, courteous to the staff, and respectful of the venue and other the acts.
11. I will make an effort to learn people's names.
    
12. I will seek the advice and opinions of those with experience. I will be open to constructive criticism. I will listen to notes and feedback with an open mind, without interrupting, offering excuses or making objections. After receiving notes I will write them down. I reflect and consider their merits after leaving the club.
13. I will be confident.
    
14. I will be humble. (Confidence and humility are not incompatible. True confidence is quiet, understated. True confidence knows its own strengths and weaknesses and through humility is open to improvements. Arrogance leaves no room for either humility or improvement. Arrogance is actually insecurity pretending to be confidence.)
    
15. And not to be forgotten, I have obligations to myself. In my act, I will talk about things about which I care, matters of consequence. If I fulfill the obligation I have to the audience to deliver the laughs I earn the right to have an agenda. I may be political. I may tell stories. I'm entitled to do whatever I want, as long as I deliver "the show" as my first priority.
    
16. I will try something new at every performance. I will learn something new at every performance. "Something new" may mean new material. Or it may simply be a new attitude, a new emotion, a new vocal inflection, or even something as small as new body language. But no matter how small, I will seek to move forward artistically with every show.
    
17. I will trust my own judgment and instincts.
    
18. I will remember the reasons why I became a comic and let that passion drive me.
    
19. I will remember that while I am on stage, the goal of comedy is not fame, glamour or money, but to bring some laughter into the lives of my audience. And when I am successful at that goal, I will share in their pleasure.
    
20. I will cut myself some slack. I will forgive myself my failures. I will allow myself to be ... in a word ... human.
    
21. And last, but first in importance, and necessary to fulfill everything above, I will enjoy myself.

Good grief! 21! This list turned out to be so much longer than I expected. I could spend my whole life trying to live up to these. I guess I'll get started.

No doubt these will change over time. But they strike me as plenty for now.

Me! Me! Me! Look at Me!

Is there anything more self indulgent than a blog? The idea that one's passing thoughts and momentary passions are so important they should be documented and published with the expectation that the world waits with baited breath to read them, is beyond hubris.

It's arrogant. It's egotistical. It's all I've ever wanted.

I've hesitated doing this for some time, because I've known there's only one person in the world absolutely guaranteed to read this.

Hi, Mom.

But then, it's lovely to know that I've got a Mom who's interested in what I have to say ... no matter how banal. That's the great thing about Moms. They find one's thoughts and activities interesting when no else will.

Why blog?

1. It's a writing exercise. An author and creative mentor of mine, Jim Mendrinos, is adamant that writers should write, even if only a little, every day. Since I may not be inspired to be funny every day, this is something else I can write. Although I'm certain I won't do this every day, it will move me a little closer to that goal.
2. This will be a creative journal. I plan to use this to document things I learn about comedy and performing, for my own benefit, if no one else's.
3. This will also, no doubt, end up being an outlet for various rants that are so inane, that my friends will not sit still for them. So I'll dump them here. You're welcome.

My inspirations for this ridiculous endeavor are two comics, friends of mine, artists who I greatly admire, Kelli Dunham and Adam Sank. I find their blogs to be witty and insightful.

The title for this blog, "Obnoxious & Inappropriate," came to me years ago, in the wee hours of the morning, while out drinking with my dear friend Paola. I wrote it down and thought it would make a good title for my memoirs. Since I don't seem to have written those yet, I'm using it here. I've always thought it captures the delicate essence of my personality and subtle nuances of the almost imperceptible effects I have on people and environments around me.

"Obnoxious & Inappropriate" ... it's how I hope to one day be remembered.